Housewives Evil? I think not.

I am currently reading a book called "Women Who Make the World Worse: and How Their Radical Feminist Assault Is Ruining Our Schools, Families, Military, and Sports" by Kate O'Brien.

I'll admit it is taking me longer than usual to read because it's difficult for me to read at times. I find myself getting slightly angry with some of the quotes/comments made by some of these women...

For example, I stumbled across this statement last night: Betty Friedan states, "But even if a woman does not have to work to eat, she can identify only in work that is of real value to society--work for which, usually, our society pays." (italics--my emphasis)

I read this phrase and re-read it and read it yet again with the same thought powering through my mind: How exactly is raising a child NOT contributing to society? This could be my personal opinion, or some may share--but aren't children that have parents that CARE about their life and want to share the moments with them typically more positive adults than those that were passed from daycare to daycare/nanny/neglected?

Please don't get me wrong. I am NOT knocking mothers that have to work to eat, or keep a roof over your babies heads. I am just simply dumbfounded at the statements Ms. Friedan makes --apparently on a consistent basis.

I once told my father that although I was attending the University, I was simply doing so to obtain my M.R.S.

Although it was stated tongue in cheek, it was not received well by either of my parents. My mother fought her way through a male dominated industry in the late 70s and early 80s--and my father wants nothing but the best for his children--and he wants his children to reach "their best" on their own. NOT with the assistance of a M.R.S. (or M.R).

Years later from that statement (you know, the M.R.S statement), I now possess a degree and no M.R.S. I am working and supporting myself and I couldn't be happier. BUT...I will not sacrifice time with my unborn children just to show some man I am just as competent as him. I take it as a great honor that I can one day be a mother and teach my children to be pillars of society. Just as my own mother did.

I strongly disagree with the statement that it takes a village to raise a child. I don't mind the village contributing every now and again--but when I'm blessed with children of my own, I want to be the one that influences my child (well, along with my husband, I suppose).

It starts at home. Period.

If you can't separate work from personal life--don't bring children in to this world. Furthermore, don't you dare knock women that choose to forgo the professional lifestyle to raise their children and maintain their households. That is a full time job--that I'd say contributes to society much more than that 30 second ad spot running on NBC at 5pm.

Holiday Hiatus

As Thursday approaches, I'm going to try my very best to think about nothing but family, friends, wrapping up the work week (ugh, I am NOT a fan of Black Friday right now!!) and getting the house ready for guests (ugh, I am NOT a fan of house guests right now!!). Not promising that I'll succeed...but I'm going to try. **edited 11/25/08: of course, I didn't succeed!!**

Childless=Clueless?

So--being a woman my age, not married and without children, I find myself stereotyped as "clueless" when it comes to children. Never mind the fact that I am exposed to children quite often through my family and friends. I'm not a mother, so I don't understand. Ok, I get it. I don't know what it is like to be 100% responsible for another human being. I don't know what it is like to love something so much it hurts. You're right. These mothers are right about the fact that I don’t have children and I don’t know what it’s like to be a mother. But, by observation I DO know how children are supposed to behave--and what parental actions are preventing children from behaving this way. You DO NOT have to be a parent to understand that if you ignore a child's continuous bad behavior--nothing good is going to come from it. Letting your child get anything he or she wants is not going to produce positive results. You don’t have to be a parent to know that. I’m not meaning to knock their parenting skills—but some of the things they let their children do are unbelievable. Even at 19 and 20 I recognized that a parent should not let a child get away with everything. Let’s start with the basics:

• Table manners. Children these days have none.
• Respecting authority/adults. Children these days have none.
• Earning privileges. Children these days believe they are entitled to everything they have and have to do nothing to earn the "fun stuff." Can you blame them? They have TVs, DVD players and video games in their bedrooms. They have personal laptops by age 5 and even cell phones!

There seems to be a huge trend on allowing the child to make decisions he or she is not capable of making. Children can't decide what is best for them UNTIL THEY ARE TAUGHT what is best for them. You don’t have to be a parent to see or know that. You don't have to be a parent to know that it is actually quite simple to make the little kid sit at the table and behave—or suffer the consequences. And this day and age, consequences do not have to be physically hitting a child (though I believe a good spanking works every now and then). It is highly likely that the kid has video games, DVD players, TV, or a cell phone. Start there. Take THAT away from him. Perfect consequence. You don't get what you want until you act the way that is expected of you. Some mothers just don't want to take any criticism (and it is usually constructive criticism offered up by--OTHER MOTHERS). I don't know, maybe they are afraid of how society will see them (but honestly--why would you care how society sees you if it is for the best interest of your child)? Parents don't want to nit-pick their children. Ok. But when your child has NO respect for authorities, NO respect for rules, NO concept of what is right or wrong and NO concept of how to treat other people (peers, siblings, adults, etc) I think you, as a parent, are WAY BEYOND the point of nit-picking. I think you are most likely headed down a very dark path once adolesence hits. I'd invest in some locks on your bedroom doors.

So here's to the mothers that would rather be their child's friend than their child's teacher. And here's to us--those childless women in the world--may we learn how NOT to raise our children by the mothers shining examples!

Wake Up. Seriously.

Next on the list. Mothers and their children. Now, I'm not a mother--and there is not a whole lot I can say about this topic. BUT--if other adults don't like to be around your child, you have a problem. If other children don't like to be around your child, you have a problem. If animals don't like to be around your child, you have a problem. Your CHILD does not have a problem, YOU have the problem. Accept that there may be something wrong--a learning disorder, a psychological disorder, something...and help that child to GET BETTER. Don't ignore the problem OR assume that society will correct the problem for you. And DON'T tell that child to "tattle" on adults that have been "mean to you." That is sick--immature--and SELFISH. Don't get offended when other adults discipline your child. As a matter of fact, what you should be doing is sitting back and evaluating the situation. Why are other adults disciplining your child? Could it possibly be that your child gets no discipline at home? That your child ACTS OUT because he is craving attention and will get it any way he knows how? Just wake up. Seriously. The second you gave birth to that child, your life changed. That "all about me" attitude should have walked out the door. It's not about you anymore. It's about your child. And raising that child to be the best human being possible. I'd say--running off friends, talking back to adults, no sense of authority, no sense of respect, no sense of doing wrong--heh, while we're at it, HARMING ANIMALS ON PURPOSE--is not the right track. Wake up.